Never Say Never!

As future parents, we spend time daydreaming and planning - what is life going to be like once the little Bean arrives? What kind of baby will I have? What kind of parent will I be?
We think we know what we will and won't do.

Hey, it's great to have a plan, but you know what they say- even the best laid plans of Mice and Men often go awry.

Pre-baby me knew enough not to get too stuck in any mindsets before the baby came along. But I'm human, so of course I had a list in my head of things I thought I would never do.

Here are some of the things I've done, that I thought would never happen:

1) The Whale Pod in My Bathroom
The "Whale Pod" is a bath toy holder that sticks to the wall above the bathtub. My first encounter with this type of thing was a few years ago while visiting a friend who had a toddler and a baby. It was bath time at their house, and I noticed their bath toy holder (shaped like a frog) above the bathtub. I thought it was cute, but I also couldn't imagine ever putting one up in my own bathroom. Best case scenario for me at that time was that our kids wouldn't have to share a bathroom with us, so if we did have these sorts of things around it wouldn't interfere with the aesthetic of our own bathroom. Otherwise I figured I'd devise a plan to cleverly hide all toys from sight. Well, flash forward a few years and lo and behold, there is a giant plastic whale attached to the travertine tile in our bathroom. Yes, we have a second bathroom, but it's in the basement and there's no way I'm going to go up and down the stairs a million times to bathe the baby. And our bathroom is small- I couldn't cleverly hide his toys if I wanted to. Truthfully, aesthetics go out the window in some cases, in order to make room for convenience.

2) Become "that" Mom
"That" mom is the one who fills up your facebook newsfeed with pictures and updates about her children, and who rarely has anything else to talk about. I told myself that wouldn't be me. Oh, how I look back and laugh at myself now. I'm fully aware I may be irritating to some of my friends when it comes to my incessant posting of adorable Sam pictures on facebook. But hey, they can unsubscribe from my posts! I know that one day I will reclaim more of that person that I was before having a baby, but right now I'm just going to give in to the all-consuming role of being a mommy to a new baby.

3) Amber Necklaces
I never could understand the amber necklace thing. Amber necklaces are supposed to be a safe way to dull teething pain for babies. They wear the amber, and the amber interacts with their body heat by releasing its oils. These oils are thought to produce an analgesic effect and help manage the pain and side effects of teething.  It sounds very hokey, plus I didn't like how they looked.
Then we went through two nights of my normally easy-going baby being full-out miserable and almost inconsolable. By the second night I was grasping at straws and booked it to the nearest place where I could pick one of these things up. I came back with an anklet so that it wouldn't be seen all the time. Also, it was multi-coloured as opposed to the honey colour I'd seen in the past and didn't really like. I still have no idea if it really makes a difference, but we haven't seen that sort of fussiness since. Now our son wears an actual amber necklace every day (ditched the anklet because it always fell off) and I don't care if anyone else thinks it's weird.

4) I Want to be a Stay at Home Mom
I was completely blindsided by this new development in my feelings, especially considering I had always been on the fence about kids in general, and in the first couple months of motherhood I was pining away to go back to work. I'm not saying that staying at home every day is the most amazing thing ever. I get frustrated, lonely, annoyed...but I feel like for once in my life that I'm doing what I should be doing, and that I have an actual purpose. I have always tried to pick a career path that would lead to that sort of fulfillment, but had yet to succeed. And of course, like many other moms, I just can't imagine someone else looking after my baby. Unfortunately our reality is such that I will have to go back to work because we need the dual income. But I don't want to and I never thought I'd say that.

5) Sleep In
Here's one that actually worked out in my favour! I thought for sure that a baby meant I would never sleep in again- I mean, "they" are always throwing that in your face from the second your pregnancy goes public. I was saddened at the thought that my lazy weekend mornings spent in my pajamas, hanging out in bed and drinking coffee, would be gone forever.
Well thank Heavens, that didn't happen. My baby is a crap-tacular sleeper. He stays up late and wakes up multiple times a night. But so far he has one redeeming sleep quality- he generally doesn't get up for the day until between 9 - 10 a.m. And then he goes for a nap roughly an hour and a half after waking up. So weekends still work out well for me. I may not spend the morning in bed as often, but I don't have to wake up early, I can stay in my pajamas, and I can relax with my cup of coffee while my husband and I take turns with the baby. I fully expect this perk to end any time (if not with this baby then for sure when we add a second to the mix), but for now it's one of the only times I can say I was happy to be wrong.

I know these five things are just the tip of the iceberg, and as the baby gets older I'll probably do a million more things I never thought I would. But the important thing is to try to remember to never say never, and don't judge other people who do things differently because you never know when that person will end up being you!

What Christmas Means to Me

Today is day 12 - the final day- of Tiny Treehugger's Photo Challenge. The assignment is a picture that represents what Christmas means to me...

To me, my baby represents everything that Christmas is about...

His birth marked the beginning of our life as a family of three, instead of a couple - and Christmas is about family.
All babies represent the miracle of life - and Christmas is about baby Jesus and the miracle of his birth.
I'll give my baby everything I can, and in return he has given me a real purpose in life - and Christmas is about giving.
He's happy, and joyful, and amazed by everything - and Christmas is about all those things as well.
He gives me hope for the future - and Christmas is about hope.
I love him so much it hurts - and of course, Christmas is all about love.

Sleep Struggles Update...

Last week I wrote about the sleep struggles we've been having, and my plan to attempt to fix them. If anyone is wondering how my brilliant plan to gently sleep train my son is going...Well, it's not. I keep forgetting he's smarter than me.

My unpredictable little non-sleeper decided two days in that he wasn't having any of that 9 p.m. nap he had been taking, so most of our nights last week were spent just trying to get him to go to sleep before midnight.

Last night was the peak of our frustration, as the little man decided he would have no part in sleeping before 1 a.m., and that as long as he was up he would spend his time whining, screaming and generally fussing. Good times, good times.

However, as it turns out our latest sleep battles may have something to do with the new skill Mr. little Man as somehow learned. Two nights ago he started army crawling, and last night he was really getting the hang of it. I've read that sleepless and difficult nights often correlate with the addition of new skills.

And we do have some small sleep victories to celebrate. The first two nights of my wake-to-sleep plan gave us a little bit of progress, and we've seen some of those longer sleep stretches return even in the nights with difficult bedtimes. Also, last night after he finally conked out at 1 am, he woke up again just before 2 am. I didn't go to him right away and he ended up fussing for a bit and then falling back asleep on his own. He didn't wake again until 5:30 a.m. to eat!

OH! And although I was SO frustrated while trying to get him to sleep last night that I just wanted to shove my head through the window, I didn't. So that's a victory worth raising my box glass of wine to!

Tonight I did manage to get him down at 9 pm, so I'll start the wake-to-sleep method again and hope for more progress this week! Wish us luck!

Christmas Accessories

Today is Day 10 of Tiny TreeHugger's photo challenge! The challenge: take a photo of your kids/pets/significant other with a Christmas accessory.

I chose my kid (surprise, surprise), dressed him in his Christmas baby legwarmers (which we all know are my favourite baby accessory), and gave him his Christmas stocking, which is the best Christmas accessory out there! (IMO)

Here's our picture:

I can't wait to fill that stocking and dress him in his whole Christmas outfit. :)

Oh Christmas Tree

We put up the old Christmas tree this weekend- It's been 2 years since we last put it up!
(This post also coincides with Tiny Tree Huggers Photo Challenge Day #7 - A picture of our Christmas tree!)

The past few years we have made ourselves so busy outside of our home, that putting up the Christmas tree was just another thing we didn't have time to do and we wouldn't be around to enjoy it anyway. But everything changes when you have a little one! It's funny how things can get busier and crazier when you add a baby, but at the same time other things just slow right down. Now that I'm at home all the time I was really looking forward to having the tree up. And although he won't remember, we have to make Sam's first Christmas a special one!

So this past weekend we ordered pizza, bought a bottle of wine, propped Sam up in his circle of neglect exersaucer so he could watch us, and we put up the tree!

Sadly, our tree is fake. We did get a real tree our first year in our house, but by the next year we had our dog and we were worried that the obnoxious puppy would eat the pine needles. So we opted for fake, but it's temporary. One day when we're in a bigger house and have a fireplace, we'll start getting real trees again. That's the dream anyway.

Our tree is less impressive than I remember it. It's skinny and isn't very full. But it came with lights, so that's a plus! And it's pretty tall. And I love it even if it isn't "perfect".

I cut the top of the tree out of the picture on purpose- we're missing our star and I haven't had a chance to get a new one yet. I made a bow out of some ribbon and threw it on up there, but I think it looks weird.

Also, the tree is looking pretty bare underneath! Can't wait to get started on putting some presents under there!

The Power of the Sun and a Dash of Lemon!

I recently purchased a pre-loved diaper that had a small, but noticeable stain. I was willing to overlook the stain because the price was okay (not great), it's a brand I love (Happy Heinys), and the colour is purple.
I felt my little man was in dire need of a dark purple diaper, and I also had to feed my compulsion to work towards having a perfect rainbow of solid colours in my collection.

So I made the purchase with the intention of trying to get rid of this stain- and people, I am proud to say: I DID IT!

I'm very pleased with myself. Here is my Before:

 

Before

And here is my After:

After

I know the stain wasn't horrible to begin with, but I'm still happy about the result! This is what I did:

-First, I bleached the diaper. I know you should never bleach a diaper cover because it can ruin the PUL and you can never be too sure about how colourfast the outer layer is. But in this case, seeing that it was second hand plus it had a glaring stain- well, you can never be too careful. (I bleached according to this entry on the Doable Diapers blog.)

-The stain was still there after the bleach, and multiple wash cycles to ensure the bleach was gone. So I re-wet the diaper and doused the stain in pure lemon juice. I just took that little container that looks like a lemon, and poured drops of the juice directly onto the stained area.

-Because it's winter here and I didn't think hanging a diaper to dry outside in -20 weather was a good idea, I hung it fleece out in my window. I've been told that bleaching diapers in the sun works best if the diaper is wet when hung.

-Then I waited. I left the diaper in the window for three days. On day two I re-wet the diaper again and added a bit more lemon juice because I could still see the stain. On day three I took it down at night and threw it in the wash with the rest of my diapers. And when it came out, the stain was gone!

I'm glad this worked, because this is small potatoes compared to the next diaper I have coming to me. I also recently purchased another pre-loved diaper, for a great price ($7!), in a print I've been coveting (Rumparooz Robotronics print). According to the pictures, it does not look pretty- hence the price. But apparently it's only been used a handful of times, and the previous owner just didn't have the time to work on removing the stains. I'm anxious to see if the magic of the sun and lemon juice can salvage my next piece of fluff!

Sleep Struggles

The past 6 months with my darling son has been, among other things, a roller coaster of sleep patterns. And more often than not this roller coaster has made me sick with sleep deprivation.

From the start he ate every two hours around the clock, with a few 5+ hour sessions of cluster feeding thrown in once in a while for good measure. Just before 3 months he started falling into a more predictable sleep pattern, and although he was still a frequent waker/nurser, he started giving me the odd 4 or 5 hour stretch of sleep. Then around 4 months that first stretch of sleep became a safe bet, and sometimes I'd even get 6 hours out of him. I even started wondering if that dreaded 4 month sleep regression I had heard about would somehow skip us?

Then as we approached 5 months it all fell back to shit. He had never been one to go to bed "for the night" at a decent time, always staying up past 11 pm and sometimes as late as midnight. But at 5 months, that 11 pm became 12:45 am, and then 1:30...and oh. my. GAWD, sometimes 2:00 IN THE MORNING. And he'd still be up every few hours after that to eat.

He used to sleep in until 10 or 11 am, to compensate for his stupidly late bedtime. Then that shifted and he began to wake up between 8:30 and 9 am. I became prematurely excited at that point, thinking that the time had come where he would start going to bed earlier and our sleep troubles would begin to disappear. Well, I was sadly mistaken. One thing did improve, in that he would start to get tired around 9 pm. But he wouldn't sleep, and if he did it was a short nap. Just enough to refresh him so he could continue to party into the night.

We are now at the point where things have calmed down again, and the pattern is more predictable. Except it's just as terrible as it was when he was a newborn. I can still get him to bed by 9 pm. Except he will without fail wake up between 45 minutes to an hour later. And then he may or may not go back to sleep. If he does go back to sleep, he needs rocking and soothing to get him there and he needs it multiple times before he is truly back to sleep again. If we can't get him to go back to dreamland, he stays up for a couple more hours, often past midnight. And then he's up every three hours, almost to the minute, to eat.

I've been pretty stubborn, trying to avoid any sort of crying it out and attempting to just ride these waves. My hope is that he will regulate his own sleep eventually. And although sometimes I feel like I have a better chance of seeing a Yeti ride a Unicorn across a double rainbow, I still hold on to this belief because he's done it before with his nap schedule. That's right. He never used to nap on a schedule, or for longer than 30 minutes at a time. Well folks, I'm proud to say that my little man figured it out at some point and now naps three times a day, for 30 minutes minimum rather than maximum. So I still believe the rest of this sleep stuff will eventually work itself out.

However, I feel that now we are at a point in this road where if I don't step in and do something, sleep habits will be ingrained in him that we may never be able to undo. I'm talking about the type of sleep problems that will keep him living at home FOREVER because he will simply be unable to stay asleep without a lengthy nightly ritual involving rocking, shushing and bum patting for the rest of his life.

So I have narrowed down the things I feel he needs help with, and I'm ready to start with a plan to help him sleep better. So far we have moved him into his own room, which is going well because he's no longer in our bed treating me like the nightly special at an all you can eat buffet. But it's not helping with the frequent wake-ups.

Problem #1 is the habitual waking after an hour of being put down for the night.
Problem #2 is the frequent waking throughout the night, at which he expects to be fed.

Goal #1 is to stop the habitual waking after an hour.
Goal #2 is to at least get back to the 4 or 5 hour stretches of sleep, and to wean down to 1 or 2 night feedings max. 

Problem #1 is the easier one to tackle, because I can do it on my own or with minimal assistance from my husband. Problem #2 is harder, because it requires him to get up in the night to help soothe the little man. So this is basically reserved only for weekends when my husband doesn't have to be up at ungodly hours in the morning so that he can go in to work early in an attempt to get home with enough time to spend with us. Weekends aren't long enough to make any sort of lasting impression, so we're waiting for holidays in order to really put in the time and commitment we'll need.

So on to Problem #1. My plan is to try the "wake to sleep" method, which you can read more about here (and various other places on the internet, but that was my main source of information). Basically, the theory is that if you have a habitual waker like mine, who wakes every hour or so for no reason other than habit, chances are the baby is having trouble transitioning from one sleep cycle to the next. As adults, we wake up multiple times in the night, but we have the ability to fall right back asleep. We might switch positions, fix our pillow, pull up our blankets, but in the morning we will hardly remember waking at all. Unfortunately babies can't always go from one sleep cycle to the next as easily, and need help with the transition.

The "wake to sleep" method instructs you to go to your baby before their habitual wake-up time, and do something to slightly rouse them from their sleep. You don't want to go in and wake them up so that they're alert, you only want to wake them just enough so that they can easily settle back down, and you essentially reset their sleep cycle. So, maybe you go in and fix their blankets, reposition them, or even change their diaper. Basically, that depends on your baby and how heavy they sleep (when they're actually sleeping). Then, you stay with them until you're sure they're back asleep. The thought is that by consistently doing this at the same time every night, you are breaking them of their habit of waking up at their habitual time, and helping them transition into a new sleep cycle. That's just my understanding and quick explanation- don't take my word as gospel and attempt any sort of sleep using only my advice.

"Wake to sleep" is part one of my plan. The other part is that I'm also going to refrain from picking him up when he wakes and needs my help to resettle. My little man does know how to soothe himself. I see him do it for almost every nap, every day. For some reason night times are more difficult for him, and he doesn't put his mad skillz to use. We've been picking him up and rocking him back to sleep at night when he wakes up, and I think we're helping to give him bad sleep habits because it seems he's starting to depend on us for this. So my new plan is to go in, reposition him and make him comfy again, and then only pat his back and shush him instead of picking him up. Unless of course it's obvious that he needs a little more contact, like if he's in some sort of pain or discomfort.

Tonight was the first night of my plan. I went in to try "waking him to sleep", by adjusting his blanket and rubbing his back. He stirred and repositioned himself, and I stayed with my hand on his back until I heard his little sigh, and his breathing became deeper again. Unfortunately he woke up about 10 minutes later, but I went in and soothed him back to sleep without picking him up. Although I had to go in there two more times after that, I'm still feeling good because I've heard him stir a few more times but I haven't had to go in. And we haven't had any tears, so that makes me happy.

Wish me luck! This could be a long week...

Christmas Baking Kick-Off: Double Chocolate Mint Cookies

For the first time ever I am going to attempt to do some holiday baking!

Today was Day 1 of a series of recipes (mostly cookies because I'm no baker, and I'm not that adventurous) that I've chosen. Hopefully by the end I'll have enough treats to put together some cute (and delicious) little gift bags for people in my family.

I decided to start off simple, with a recipe I've made before - Double Chocolate Chunk Cookies. Except around Christmas when mint M&Ms hit the shelves I like to sub them in instead of chocolate chunks. So what we end up with is Double Chocolate Mint Cookies.

(I'm not a food blogger, and I only have a little point-n-shoot camera that I barely know how to use, so please excuse the barely adequate photography)

They're a soft, cakey, rich, and chocolately cookie. The mint M&Ms are a perfect compliment and turn an average everyday cookie into holiday goodness.

For some reason they turned out a little dryer than they have in the past, and as I said -I am no baker- so I'm not sure why. They're still delicious though! It took a lot of self control to only taste test a couple before wrapping them up and putting them away in the freezer! 

When I make these outside of the holiday season I like to use peanut butter M&Ms, which I also think make an amazing addition to the wonderful chocolateyness of this cookie.

Anyway, the recipe is below if you want it. It's actually a Nestle Toll House cookie recipe, and I've only slightly adapted it:

2 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 cups baking cocoa
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup salted butter or margarine, softened
2/3 cup sugar
2/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 eggs
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1 package mint M&Ms

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

In a medium bowl combine flour, cocoa and baking soda.

In a large bowl beat butter, sugar, brown sugar, and vanilla until creamy.
Beat in eggs.
Gradually beat in flour mixture.

Stir in chocolate chips and most of the M&Ms.

Drop by rounded tablespoon on an ungreased cookie sheet.
Press a few of the leftover M&Ms onto the top of the cookies.

Bake for 9 - 11 minutes or until cookies are puffed and centers are set but still soft.
Cool on baking sheet for 2 minutes before removing to wire racks to cool completely.

Delicious when warm!!!

It's a Wrap

It's Day 6 of Tiny Tree Hugger's Photo Challenge! I'm pretty proud of myself for only missing one day so far!

Today's assignment is to take a picture of Christmas wrapping paper:

This is what I'm working with this year. A mishmash of wrapping paper from years past (passed?)
Usually I try to pick a creative (and greener) way to wrap gifts, or I pick a colour theme. This year I'm just going to use what we've got because our budget is a little more strict this Christmas, and I'm lacking the creative energy to pick a theme or come up with a cooler way to wrap gifts. Plus this stuff is taking up way too much space- it barely fits in that container.

Besides, it feels like our list of people we buy for is getting shorter and shorter as more people are opting not to partake in the traditional gift-giving, so I'm actually feeling a little defeated. What's the point in putting effort into wrapping gifts when I feel like people don't even care about receiving them? I know that gifts are not the reason for the season, but I'm not ashamed to admit that I really do enjoy gift exchanges.

So I'm using what little creative energy I have to do some Christmas baking this year. Just because people don't want to exchange gifts doesn't mean they're going to get away with not receiving anything at all from me!

Christmas Decor

The assignment for Day 5 of Tiny Tree Hugger's 12 Days of Christmas Photo Challenge is to take a picture of a Christmas decoration, but not the Christmas tree. No problem there, because ours isn't even close to being up yet!

Considering my extreme dislike of Christmas songs, it should come as no surprise that I don't do a lot of Christmas decorating either. But I do LOVE Christmas tree ornaments! However, just like I don't listen to very traditional Christmas music, I also don't like to decorate in traditional Christmas colours. Our Christmas colour theme is silver, blue, green, pink and purple. No red or green in sight. I even regret buying a green Christmas tree, and wish we would've gone for white instead.

So anyway, because I love tree ornaments so much I was actually super excited to go digging through our decorations to pick something to take a picture of. The only problem is that I couldn't narrow it down to just one thing.

Hopefully this doesn't disqualify me, but here is my picture:

In the back I have my ginormous silver ball ornament, which is new this year. I have no idea what I'll actually do with it, since I only have the one and it might look a little ridiculous on the tree. Then in the middle I have my two very favourite ornaments- the funky turquoise ornament (which I also have in hot pink), and the elegant pink ornament with delicate snowflakes. And the little frog prince in the front was just pleading with me to let him be in the picture...I just couldn't say no to that face!

And, just because I feel bad for not including them, here are the runner's up that didn't make the photo challenge picture:

The disco ball (every tree should have at least one disco ball!) and of course, the Christmas Pickle.

Okay, now I'm RIDICULOUSLY EXCITED to set up our Christmas tree this weekend!

Legwarmers- Not Just for Girls and Bad 80s Aerobics Videos Anymore!

So I've already professed my love of cloth diapers and babywearing...I think it's time I profess another one of my loves: Baby Legwarmers

Back in my preggo days, while scouring Etsy for various baby products, I realized I was being bombarded with ridiculously cute pictures of little babies wearing onesies with ...legwarmers? Not just girl babies, but boy babies too! Before getting pregnant I hadn't even realized this was an actual thing. But the deeper you get into the world of baby stuff, the more you realize just how many things are out there that you never even knew existed.

Baby leg warmers are one of those things. And I very quickly went from thinking "Huh...those are kinda weird" to "THOSE ARE THE BEST THINGS EVER!".

So let me tell you why baby leg warmers are AMAZING inventions that no parent should go without!

First and foremost, they are just so much easier than pants. When babies are newborns they pee and poop around the clock. You're changing diapers all day long. Sure, diaper changes are easy because the newborns essentially lay there like little blobs of cuteness, but taking pants off and then putting them back on continuously is practically useless. Then as the baby gets older they might need diaper changes less often, except by this time your little blob has morphed into a little person who, at some point while you weren't looking, managed to learn Irish dancing and break dancing- and can do them at the same time! How do these little people manage to contort their bodies this way??? So basically, by this point just getting the diaper back on the baby is a huge challenge, never mind attempting pants! Baby leg warmers solve these problems completely. You can keep your baby's legs warm without having to mess around with pants. Diaper changes are so much easier!

Second, and maybe most important, they are really cute. They come in so many colours and designs that you can find a pair to match pretty much any outfit you have for your baby. And it doesn't matter if your baby is a boy. Babies can get away with wearing pretty much anything. I mean, do you think it's "girly" for a baby boy to wear a onesie, considering in the 80s it was all the rage for girls to wear them? To me, as long as the colours are neutral a baby boy can totally rock a pair of legwarmers without looking like a baby girl. And honestly, do we really need to project that degree of gender stereotyping on a little baby?

Third, those legwarmers are great at protecting little knees when baby starts rolling over and then flailing about like a fish out of water. They also protect little knees when babies start crawling.

Fourth, when it's cold outside and you have to dress your baby in pants out of necessity, they make great layering pieces for that little bit of extra warmth. Plus they cover the skin that would otherwise be exposed in that inevitable gap between the baby's pant leg and socks when you pick them up.

Five, when your baby grows up into a toddler, they can be used as very handy arm-warmers under t-shirts.

Legwarmers have become a staple in our house, despite my husband's extreme dislike of them (that silly "too girly" argument). And yeah, I've heard my fair share of comments from family members who also think they look silly, or are girly, or whatever. But these aren't the people changing my baby's diapers every day so I could care less what they think. If they don't like the legwarmers I will gladly dress my little guy in pants when they babysit, and they can wrestle with getting them off and on him all they like. But personally, I choose convenience.

Oh, the other great thing about baby leg warmers is that babies don't outgrow them as quickly as they do with everything else! In fact, they grow into them at first, so a pair of legwarmers will take you from newborn all the way through to toddler. At 6 months Sam has already grown out of a massive pile of clothes. But the one thing that has stayed consistent in his wardrobe are his legwarmers. So we only need minimal numbers of pants, which means I actually end up saving money because generally legwarmers are cheaper than pants. That's why I'm not ashamed to admit I have over 20 pairs of them. He's been wearing them since he was just over 2 months old, and will continue to wear them for many more months to come!

Leg warmer love!

I do want to clarify that baby leg warmers aren't always cheaper than pants, but they certainly can be if you look for good prices. The Babyleg brand name will run you about $14.95 in the stores (from what I've seen), which to me is kind of crazy. But, I have found some wicked deals on Babylegs on daily deal sites like Babysteals.com. You just have to watch for them and be ready! Also, check out Etsy. There's tons of fun designs and colours, plus the added benefit of supporting small home-based businesses. Last but not least, I personally like MyLittleLegs for legwarmers. They have a huge selection, offer bulk discounts and free shipping in Canada and the US, and they also have great customer service. They sent me the wrong pair of legwarmers in one of my orders and the response to my email was almost immediate. Before the end of the day they confirmed they were sending out the right pair, plus they told me they didn't want to inconvenience me further by making me send the wrong pair back!

So yeah, I love baby leg warmers. I'd shout it from a mountain if I could! And maybe, one day, I'll look back at my son's baby pictures and wonder what I was thinking...But for now, if dressing my baby in legwarmers is wrong then I don't wanna be right...

Baby's First Legwarmers - and it looks like he loves them!

On the First Day of Christmas my True Love Gave to me...

Okay, so the assignment for Day #4 of Tiny Tree Hugger's 12 Days of Christmas Photo Challenge is to take a picture of something that represents your favourite Christmas song.

So here it is:

Nothing says Christmas and True Love like a beer!

Yes, that is a beer.

To be completely honest (and I know people will think I'm insane), I strongly dislike Christmas music. I can tolerate it on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day but other than that it makes twitch. An angry twitch.

I blame working in the mall in my teen years, when Christmas music would start playing on November 1 and continue until the New Year. To this day I'd rather shove a fork in my eye than listen to almost any Christmas song before Christmas Eve.

But I'm not a total Scrooge- I did say "almost any" Christmas carol. There are a select few that I actually like and will happily listen to before Christmas. Number 1 on that list- The 12 Days of Christmas by Bob and Doug McKenzie! Canadian Christmas classic! If beer and backbacon don't scream Christmas, then I don't know what does ;)

Runner's up include:

Drummer Boy - by Justin Bieber featuring Busta Rhymes (the rap solos crack me up every. time. Seriously, listen to it! It's so horrible you can't help but love it!) 

All I Want for Christmas - the Mariah Carey version! (I'm a little bit of a closet Mariah Carey fan. Plus this song is so catchy and upbeat, it's hard not to tap your feet to the beat!)


What about you? Do you love the classics, or do you prefer the funny ones?

Day 3 Photo Challenge FAIL :(

So it only took until Day 3 of Tiny Tree Hugger's Photo Challenge for me to fall off the wagon! I had been reminding myself all day on Thursday to remember to post my picture, but come Friday it slipped away. We had a busy day on Friday with running errands and then going to my Dad's for dinner. We didn't get home until after midnight. During a 3 a.m. feed I suddenly remembered and I was SO ANNOYED with myself!

Anyway, tomorrow is Day 4, and I WILL NOT FORGET! But in the spirit of trying to finish what I started, I'm going to post Day 3 now even though it doesn't count.

Day 3 was about favourite holiday drinks.

What I have here is Mulled Cranberry Cider. What I really would have liked to post was Mulled Wine. I could drink that stuff all night! I have a lonely bottle of red wine, but unfortunately no mulling spices on hand to join it. Although the mulling spices are on their way from Epicure, and I am very excited about that!

But I do love the taste of this mulled cranberry cider, and it's definitely something I really want closer to the holidays. Although I'm sure a homemade cider would be infinitely better, the Second Cup powder isn't half bad. The delightful cranberry scent mixed with warm cinnamon screams Christmas and winter! Drinks like these make the winter months a touch more tolerable for this fair-weather girl.

In fact, I'm going to enjoy a cup right now :)

Family Pictures: As Good as it's Gonna Get...

Day #2 of Tiny Tree Hugger's 12 Days of Christmas Photo Challenge was to take a family picture and make sure I'm in it.

This was no easy feat! For one thing, I generally dislike being in pictures. For another thing, it's not the easiest thing in the world to squish a baby, dog and two adults into a picture when you have very limited photography abilities!

All I can say is that I'm grateful for digital cameras and the delete function!

So, this is our family picture....I definitely don't love it, but I don't hate it either so that's something.

Songs for Sam

I've always loved songs for their lyrics, and when I was pregnant it seemed like suddenly almost every song, old and new, was somehow about that little life growing inside of me.

Songs that had previously made me think of other things were making me think of my baby instead. Songs that were meant to be romantic were reminding me of my unborn son. Sometimes it was only just a line or two that made me think of him. I would hear these songs on the radio, while driving in my car. And I would sing along with them, and cry tears of overwhelming love and joy and fear. Yes, I was that freak next to you at the stoplight belting it out like I was performing a live concert for an arena of people. Gotta love them hormones!

But even now those songs still remind me of my little guy, and they sit compiled in a playlist called "Bean" on my iTunes. Sometimes I put them on for him to hear while I sing along (I don't sing to him too loudly- wouldn't want to harm his hearing at such a young age!). Sometimes I just listen to them and reminisce about being pregnant, and about how much he has grown since he was born.

I'd like to burn these songs onto a CD, complete with a booklet of lyrics, for him to have one day. Of course, who knows if CDs will become obsolete by then, but I'm sure I can hold on to an old CD player for him to listen to when the time comes ;)

So here is my "Songs for Sam" playlist so far, with a little blurb about what the song means to me. I've also linked them to their videos on YouTube in case anyone is so inclined to listen to them :)

Haven't Met You Yet - Michael Buble
This was the first song that made me think of my future baby, even before we ever started trying to get pregnant.  I'd always been a little bit on the fence about kids in general, but even then I knew that once that child came into our lives I'd love it like nothing I'd ever loved before.

Stereo Hearts - Gym Class Heroes
This song was big during my pregnancy. Like every time I got in the car I would hear it, twice. And while most of the lyrics didn't relate, I always loved the lines 

"My heart's a stereo
It beats for you so listen close
Hear my thoughts in every note..." 

because he is the only one who has ever heard my heart from the inside, and while I was pregnant my heart truly was beating for him- to keep him alive and growing.

A Thousand Years - Christina Perri
This whole song speaks to me, I wouldn't even be able to pick out just one line if I tried.

Landslide - the Glee version (I know, I know, I'm such a loser)
I'm not totally sure what this song was actually about, but to me it was about growing up and leaving that place where everything in my life revolved around myself.

Never Gonna Be Alone - Nickleback (Yes, I realize this probably makes me a bigger loser than the Glee song)
A promise to Sam, that I will be here for him through thick and thin. And also a bit of regret about being on the fence for so long, and not bringing him into the world sooner so that I could have started my life with him earlier.

Love You Like a Love Song - Selena Gomez
Haha, okay this song is totally cheesy and not at all meant to be from a mother to her infant son...but hey, I can't help it. It's catchy. And it does have the word "baby" in it. 

I Won't Give Up - Jason Mraz
This is such a powerful song to me. Every word resonates. It's my promise to Sam that not only will I be with him through thick and thin, but I am also committed to keeping my marriage and our family together. It also admits that I'm not perfect, but I will keep trying.

Never Quit Loving You - Jill Barber
Another promise to Sam, that my love is unconditional. And really, I believe our children are the only people in our lives to whom we can truly make the promise of unconditional love.

Sweet Child of Mine - Sheryl Crow
Pretty self-explanatory. I like the Sheryl Crow cover because she sings about a male child.

Home - Phillip Phillips
The world is such a crazy place in general, and toss in a baby who has to learn about it all...And a girl who suddenly has to be a mother to that baby. This is my promise to help Sam navigate life, and make this crazy world his home.

I still sing these songs out loud in the car, and I still cry a lot of the time while I'm doing it. And I'm adding new songs all the time. My  hope is that one day he will hear these songs, or read their lyrics, and really know just how much I love him.

What about you? Any songs that remind you of your children?

The Beginning of Letting Go...

Before Sam was born, I spent hours creating the perfect nursery for him. Some people will say that you don't need to spend that much time working on a nursery, because for the first few months the baby will not be spending much time in it. I knew that would  be true, because we had every intention of following the WHO recommendation to keep Sam in our room until he was 6 months old. And that's exactly what we did. But I'm still happy I put all that effort into it then, because there is no way I would have gotten it to where I wanted it had I waited until after he was born. And now that we're starting the transition over, it's ready for him. His own peaceful, happy little space.

I would have kept him in our room longer, and maybe if this transition doesn't go well he might end up back with us. But the issue I started having was that when we co-sleep (which is often) he has started using me as a human pacifier. He knows how to soothe himself, he does it every day for naps. But with me so close to him, it's so easy for him to reach over and cry and scream every time he wakes up until I nurse him. And it's so easy for me to, for lack of better terms, pop a boobie in his mouth so we can all get back to sleeping.

Co-sleeping used to be a wonderful and peaceful thing, guaranteed to help him sleep so we could all get the rest we need. Unfortunately now I've become an All You Can Eat Special at the All-Night Buffet. Where he used to sleep in longer stretches in our bed, he now wakes every hour or two. I feed on demand, and I don't have any intention of weaning him off all night feedings yet. However, it's now gotten to the point where I feel it's affecting the quality of his sleep- which is more important than my sleep.

Keeping him in the playpen/bassinet next to my bed is what I had intended to do for a little longer. But it was recently suggested to me that maybe my presence in the room is waking him more often, and he's not soothing himself back to sleep because he can see me there. So there it is...the incentives to start this transition.

Last night was the first night in his crib. He didn't fall asleep until around 12:30 (normal for him), and I brought him into bed with us when he woke up at 3 am for a feeding. I was so lonely without him in our room, I couldn't help it. My heart literally ached and my stomach hurt, thinking about him all alone in his crib in the room next to ours, that suddenly seemed so far away. Baby steps! But as the next 4 hours of sleep with him next to me turned fitful and restless, full of sporadic crying and night feedings, I remembered my original motivation for starting the transition, and so I'm ready to try again tonight. My goal is not to bring him into our bed until after 5 am this time.

I'm not ready to give up those morning smiles and cuddles just yet, so I still plan to bring him into bed in the mornings. But we both need to be getting better sleeps. And I think I need to start to let go just a little bit. 

It's nicer than our room!

Another New Diaper!

I finally have it in my possession! The diaper that pushed me over the edge and into the world of cloth diapering!

It's a Sweet Pea pocket diaper, in the new Argyle print! I bought it from Tiny Tree Huggers, an (almost) local cloth diaper/natural parenting store. I love love love it :)  Not only do I love the awesome print, but I also really love Sweet Pea diapers. They fit my little guy great, and so far we've never had any issues with leaks. I trust these diapers during nap times and when we're out and about. I'm so happy it's finally found its place in my collection!

Winter is Here :(

So I've decided to enter Tiny Tree Huggers 12 Days of Christmas Photo Challenge!

I'm not really great at following through, so I hope I can stick with it and actually do the whole challenge. As it is I'm off to a shaky start, as it's after 9 pm and I just remembered I have to post the first photo today before 11:59 pm.

So the first photo challenge is to take a picture of an outdoor winter scene...Well, inspired photographer I am not. Here is my picture:

I'll call it "Winter Is Here :("

This was taken from just outside my front door, which is about as far outside as I ever care to be in the winter. It had just snowed, and that's my white car camouflaged under 6 inches of it.

I prefer my white fluff to be in the form of cute cloth diapers, not cold, wet snow.

Diaper Mail!

I'm so behind on posting about my newest fluff! I've gotten three in the last couple days!

These super sweet dipes were waiting for me at the border, which my sister in law and brother in law so kindly picked up for me! My passport is actually expired, so these beauties would have been waiting for me for a while!

On the left we have a Happy Heinys one-size in a glow in the dark Skulls print. I'm pretty sure they don't make that print anymore, and it was pretty hard to find. I ordered it online from Diapers Etc, in the US, and then of course stumbled upon it on a Canadian website after the fact. Oh well! I was hoping I'd be as happy with the OS as I am with the sized diapers. So far it has not disappointed! Unfortunately I will probably not be using this diaper in my regular rotation, only because I want to keep it in as good condition as possible. We'll still use it, but not every day.

On the right we have a Rumparooz OS in the Preppy print. Another one that I had trouble finding in Canada, although it's a new print. I ordered it from The Green Nursery. I will likely not be using it too frequently either. We used this diaper during nap time today and I was very impressed! No leaks! The diaper comes with an insert and an extra soaker that snaps onto the insert. The soaker snaps on the insert in two different places, depending on whether you have a boy or girl which affects where you need the extra absorbancy. The diaper is quite bulky with the insert and soaker, but you can't complain about no leaking! And I  absolutely LOVE the colours in this diaper! They are very bright and vivid. There was more pink than I was expecting, but it's not overwhelming so this diaper remains gender neutral. I also love the multi-coloured snaps. This is easily one of my favourites, if not my very favourite, diaper print so far.

Below we have another Happy Heinys OS, in the Turquoise Ooga Booga print. Also another print that I don't think they're producing anymore. I did manage to find this one in Canada before I went and ordered it from the US. I would have preferred snaps, but they only had the velcro closure. I actually find velcro much easier to use, but it gets pilly and doesn't look very pretty after a while.

So now I'm just waiting for three more diapers...One that I will hopefully get my grubby little paws on tomorrow, and the other two that should arrive in the next few weeks. I'm pretty much banned from purchasing any more until the new year now...I hope I can resist!

Baby Led Weaning

I knew from the beginning that when it came time for little Beaner to start eating solids that I would be making his baby food. I got a Baby Bullet as a gift and I was so excited to use it- mainly because it has a smiley face!

But then I heard about this thing called Baby Led Weaning, where you actually skip the whole puree stage and move straight to finger foods.

I was simultaneously terrified and intrigued. Of course my first thought was "Won't he choke???", but it was also really neat to think that at only 6 months old he could possibly feed himself.

I started looking into it more, and ordered the Baby Led Weaning book by Gill Rapley and Tracey Murkett. I found some useful websites and forums, and of course I tapped into the infinite knowledge of the other mamas in my May Mommies group.

What really made sense to me about the whole thing is that when you breastfeed on demand you are trusting your baby to know what he needs and when he needs it. That is the concept that carries over to Baby Led Weaning (BLW). You are essentially trusting your baby's instincts, that he will be able to learn how to chew and how to swallow, and he will be able to choose what to eat and how much of it he needs.

When you spoon-feed your baby you are in control of what goes into him and how much of it he consumes. You have no real way of knowing if it's enough or too much. Also, it could be confusing- for example, pureed peas and pureed avocado would essentially look the same but taste completely different, so your baby never really knows what to expect or learns how to recognize different foods from the start. 

The other thing the book says is that when you spoon-feed, the baby learns how to swallow before he learns how to chew, and he doesn't learn how to manipulate the food around in his mouth. When you transition from purees to textures, and then to finger foods, this can make it more difficult because now suddenly the baby needs to know how to chew, which is a skill they haven't had a chance to develop.

Also, the book points out that unlike an adult, a baby's gag reflex is triggered before something reaches the back of his throat. This makes choking less likely because he will start to cough and move the food around in his mouth before the point of it being lodged in his throat, blocking his airway. Of course choking can happen, but it can also happen with purees. Regardless of how you feed your baby, you always have to be aware and be prepared for that situation.

The philosophy behind BLW is that "food before one is just for fun". So essentially this is about playing with food, learning how to chew and swallow, and eventually coming to the realization that food can stop those hungry feelings. Breast milk (or formula if formula fed) is still the main food source.

So eventually my feelings of intrigue became bigger than my fear of the Beaner choking.

Well, he turns 6 months on Thursday, but I couldn't wait any longer! His first food- Cucumber!

I can't say he loved it because he made some pretty hilarious faces that seemed to tell me he thought it was gross. But he kept sucking it and gumming it for a little while, until he got bored and decided his toys were a better choice. He did cough a bit at one point, and I tried hard to hide my fear. When they cough you aren't supposed to react (unless it's clear they need help). You should stay calm, model coughing for them so that they can learn and copy you, and do a sweep of their mouth with your finger if necessary. You shouldn't panic, or startle them by smacking them on the back. That kind of reaction can actually cause the opposite effect by interfering with their natural instinct and abilities and possibly cause the situation to become more serious.

All in all it was a successful first time! We got some cute pictures and video, and he seemed to at least enjoy exploring something new. I don't know what we'll try tomorrow- Maybe banana or apple? Or broccoli or asparagus? Either way, it's super exciting!

Wear ALL the Babies!!!

So, I wanted my first babywearing post to be full of references, facts, resources...But all that was just delaying me from writing about something that I truly love. Maybe in the future I'll write a more informational post, but tonight I think I'm just going to mostly write about how I feel.

Babywearing is exactly as it sounds, in case it's not something you're that familiar with- it's literally the act of wearing your baby.

It seems popular, and almost fashionable, to wear your baby now as it's becoming more common to see it happen in movies (The Hangover) or TV (Guys with Kids).

I don't remember exactly how I was introduced to babywearing. Maybe it was a good friend who loves it too. Maybe it was a picture of some celebrity wearing their baby. Or maybe it was while watching The Hangover.

Anyway, it was a concept I had heard of and it was something I was sure I wanted to do from the time I find out I was pregnant.

My friend kept offering to lend me her woven wrap, but I was very sure I wouldn't be able to learn how to tie the thing and it would end in disaster with the baby on the floor. So I was set on getting something with straps and buckles.

My first baby carrier was a Beco Gemini. About two or three weeks after my baby was born, I felt I was quickly going crazy. I couldn't do anything with free hands because he wanted to be held All. The. Time. Part of me was more than happy to oblige, but the other part of me was starting to feel quite overwhelmed and maybe even a little depressed. The transition to being a mom is hard as it is, and not being able to move freely around, or use both hands, makes it even harder.

So I forced myself to go out (leaving the house was also overwhelming) and I went to check out some carriers. I settled quickly on the Beco Gemini because of the many options for carrying the baby (front, back, side) and that it was supposed to be good for babies 7 lbs and up without needing an extra insert to keep a small baby stable.

As soon as I strapped my baby into that carrier it was like I could see the sun again. I was hands-free! I could type on the computer! I could eat a meal! I could do some cleaning! I could demonstrate jazz hands!
But something else amazing happened too. I genuinely loved it. I came for the convenience, and I stayed for the closeness. He snuggled in, and I could feel him breathing against me. And he loved it too, because he would fall asleep almost immediately. That carrier became a Godsend. I could get things done, and when he was cranky I would pop him in there and he'd fall asleep. Perfection.

My babywearing friend had also brought over her woven wrap to try. It sat on my dresser for a couple weeks, but I kept seeing pictures of other mamas on my May Mama facebook group wearing their babies in these wraps. Finally I decided I would give it a try. I watched some YouTube videos and attempted my first carry with the woven wrap.

I didn't do a great job, but it worked enough for me to fall even more madly in love with babywearing. There's just something about that piece of material wrapped around the both of us, hugging him so gently, yet firmly, close to me. No buckles, no straps. Just me, him, and a long piece of fabric. It felt more close, more warm, and more natural.

Oh my God, I LOVE wearing my baby!

I can wear him for hours, and he loves it too. He can see everything from up high. If he's tired he can lay his head on my chest and hear my beating heart while he sleeps. I can feel his little chest breathing in, breathing out. I can kiss his soft head, and drink in his baby smell.

They say that babies that are worn are happier and cry less. I have no comparison, but I do know we get told all the time how quiet and happy our baby is. Yes, he has his moments (hours?), but in general he is a happy baby so far.

They also say that babies that are worn feel more secure and confident. Again, I have no idea exactly how true this is, and at 6 months old he isn't quite at that "stranger danger" stage yet. But, he is very easy going so far. Calm in crowds when he's passed from stranger to stranger. Calm when he wakes up in a strange place. Calm when anyone holds him. He's only just begun exhibiting a preference for me, but so far only when he's very tired. I'm interested to see how his demeanor continues to develop. Will he still be happy, calm, confident and secure? Does wearing him help with this?

I think there are so many benefits to being close with your children, being affectionate, touchy-feely. It's validating and makes them feel loved. It strengthens your bond. But now I mostly wear him because I love it.
He doesn't need to be held all the time anymore. I can get things done while he naps. But when a few days go by and I realize I haven't worn him, I bring out that wrap and strap him to me. We go for walks and very rarely use a stroller. We go grocery shopping and he doesn't need to sit in the dirty metal cart or stay cramped in his car seat. I just love having him close to me, and it's so much easier than trying to push a stroller through narrow aisles, or lugging him around in his car seat. I can use the stairs while people with strollers have to search out ramps or elevators. I can easily walk through crowds. And I can do it all knowing that my baby is safe, and happy. He'll stay for hours in the wrap or carrier, happily switching between napping and observing. Which means I get more time to do the things I want to do without being stressed out by a crying baby.

It's something I knew I would do even before he was born. But it's not something I expected to reach so far into me and become such an important part of my emotional bond with him. I'm going to keep wearing him for as long as he'll tolerate it. And my heart will break a little the day he no longer does.

Time to Get Your Bake On!

I LOVE Pinterest!

Especially now, being on maternity leave. It gives me something to do while nursing, or when I can't sleep. Sure, there's always Facebook, but Pinterest is sometimes more useful and refreshing.

I love browsing the food category. Now that I actually have time to make dinner, or do the odd baking, it's so fun to browse pictures of food and plan our meals and snacks.

Pinterest recently led me to this recipe for Skinny Chocolate Banana Fudge Muffins off of Sally's Baking Addiction.

I made them on Wednesday night to serve at a "play-date" on Thursday (aka a few moms getting together to have a hen session while their babies stare at each other) and they were a hit!

They're about as healthy as you can get for a muffin- whole wheat flour, banana, applesauce, less than a cup of sugar, no butter or oil!  And the best part is that they don't taste healthy!. These will satisfy even the most intense chocolate cravings, and you'll only feel little to no guilt about it!

So please, do yourself a favour, follow the link AND BAKE THOSE MUFFINS!

Diaper Mail!

Yes, more diaper mail...This will stop soon, I promise! I just got really excited and ordered a lot in a short span of time, but that's coming to an end as Christmas is fast approaching and money needs to be spent on presents! I admit, there are 5 more diapers that will make their way into this house in the next few weeks, but then it's done until the new year. (Unless I get diapers for Christmas, which I'm really hoping I do!)

Anyway, these two Glow Bug diapers actually came yesterday, bought pre-owned off of a private seller:

On the left we have a skull print, on the right it's rockets! How cute!?

I have one other Glow Bug diaper, that was also pre-owned. I wasn't too impressed the first time I used it, because it leaked. But I think I have it figured out now, and was able to adjust the fit so that leaks don't happen anymore. I have enough faith in this diaper that I felt okay adding two more to my stash, and really who could resist those prints? Glow Bug comes out with super cute prints, but I think the problem with them is that when you buy them new you have to buy them as a whole set instead of individually.

Glow Bugs aren't my go-tos if I know nap time is around the corner, but otherwise I like them! I washed these last night so they're ready to go today. Can't wait!

Diaper Mail!

More diaper mail today!

These came in from For the Monster today:

 I think they might be going out of business, because pretty much everything seems to be on sale on their website and the selection is limited. This was a good deal though, because I paid used prices for these brand new diapers.

On the left we've got three medium Happy Heinys with velcro closures (Red, Navy & Lime green). Generally I dislike the look of velcro closure, and these sized Happy Heinys are no exception. I really really dislike the looks of these diapers. But, I bought one used through a local buy & sell a few weeks ago, and I fell in love with how easy it is to use. I ordered these with the intention that they'll be packed in the diaper bag when we go out, or if someone is babysitting. They're also daddy-friendly, so next time my husband says he doesn't know how to work the cloth diapers I'll point him in the direction of these Happy Heinys, because they are almost identical to disposables.

The diapers on the right are Sweet Pea OS (one size) in Apple Green and Indigo Blue. I have one other Sweet Pea in my stash, in the Penguin print. I really like the fit of these diapers, and I didn't want to keep using the Penguin print as often as I have been (trying to keep my prints in very good condition!), so I was happy to find these for just under $10 each! Plus they come with inserts, which is good.

I kind of wish now that I had gotten three Sweet Peas and two Happy Heinys instead though. I love the Happy Heinys for their ease of use, but since these are the sized style they'll probably only fit him for the next few months. Also, they don't come with inserts which is sucky.


 Next, these came in from Cozy Bums:

The Maple Leaf print is a Charlie Banana One Size. I've been dying for that print, but haven't seen it in stock anywhere until now. I'm a little concerned because the design is printed onto the diaper fabric and I'm scared of it peeling...So unfortunately it looks like this diaper will end up being only very gently used.

The orange and blue diaper is another Best Bottoms diaper cover. It's called Orange Sherbet. I love that they name the diaper colours after ice cream flavours! I've given my other Best Bottoms diaper a whirl a few times and I love it. I'm so excited to have another cover to choose from, plus I ordered two extra inserts with it. They recommend three inserts per diaper, but I've been spending too much lately so I only ordered the two. I only use these as going out diapers anyway, and usually only need to change the insert once in the time that we're gone, so it will all work out fine. I plan on stocking up on more covers and inserts in the future though.

I just want to add that I love the Cozy Bums online store. They have a good selection, and friendly customer service. Plus I love supporting Canadian retailers. I know I do hunt out good deals from US retailers, but I also support local/Canadian when I can! (And hey, I don't feel too guilty from buying from the US- I love our neighbours to the South!)

Grocery Shopping Pet Peeves

Seriously, what is wrong with people in grocery store parking lots?

I don't understand the impatient people who can't wait for me to finish putting my baby in the car seat, or clear out of the way, before they try to angrily maneuver their car in around me. Not only is this dangerous, but it's downright rude. I mean, can you really not wait the extra minute for me to get my child safely into, or out of, his car seat before you shove in with your vehicle? Or can't you just go find another stall if I'm not going fast enough for you?

And what the heck do they think they're doing when someone is simply walking by a stall, pushing a cart (and baby in my case), just trying to get into the store and they decide that they have to turn AROUND them to park somewhere instead of just waiting for them to clear the way? With winter here now, and all the slush and snow, heaven forbid someone slip as some jackass is pulling this little stunt and they end up running the person over.   

And not that this is dangerous, but while I'm on the subject of grocery store pet peeves, I will also mention the people who exit through the enter door. So flippin' annoying, especially when the person exiting out the wrong door has a gigantic cart, blocking the whole entrance and shoves their way through. If you're going to leave through the wrong door, the LEAST you can do is yield to the incoming traffic considering we are the ones using the proper door.

It's all good once I get in the store...I'm much too distracted by all the things to care much about what others are doing.

The Great Sleep Debate...and Why It Pisses Me Off

Is there a wrong way to put baby to bed? 

Yes, yes there is:

I bring this up because how a parent chooses to put their baby to bed is a hotly debated topic and it can draw some serious divisions between people.

So far in my experience there are generally two camps: 

Parents who choose to "sleep train" and parents who don't. 

Sleep training usually involves some form of letting your baby cry in order to teach the baby to soothe themself and sleep without having to be rocked/held/bounced/walked/driven around the neighborhood/hung upside-down, etc.

Parents who choose not to sleep train will likely either spend countless hours putting their baby to sleep in their own room/crib/bassinet, or they might bed-share. 

Babies who are naturally good sleepers generally wouldn't need any sort of sleep training.

Now, the problem with parents who sleep train, more specifically parents who let their babies cry it out (CIO), and parents who choose not to do any of the above, is that these choices become polarizing. You end up being on one side or the other, and each side is convinced that their way is the right way.

Of course, not every person feels the need to take sides or judge the other- but many do and frankly, it pisses me off.

Personally, at this point in time, I choose not to do any sleep training. That is my personal choice, that is the way I choose to parent. I also know that I may reach a breaking point in the future (because I'm fairly sure my baby is trying to break me) and I might need to re-evaluate my parenting strategy. But right now, while I'm on maternity leave with no other commitments other than my darling boy, I choose not to sleep train, not to CIO, and more often than not we choose to bed-share. 

There have been studies that have shown that letting your baby CIO can cause negative long-term effects. Basically, studies have found that when babies are in distress the cortisol hormone floods their system, and even after they have calmed down and are sleeping their cortisol levels will still be high. These high levels of cortisol are said to damage a baby's developing neurons and your child may show certain deficits as they get older. Along with the physical repercussions, people against CIO will also tell you that you will essentially destroy the relationship of trust that you work all day to build with your baby; your baby will not learn to self-soothe, it will only learn that you won't respond to it at night and so it will just give up; your baby will learn to shut down in the face of distress and will not thrive, or be able to handle stress as an adult. There's more, but you get the picture- if you let your baby CIO you will essentially break your baby.

As someone who does not choose to take this route, do I believe all these claims? Yes and no. Do I believe there may be long term effects on my baby? Possibly. Do I believe that babies who are left to CIO only learn that their parents won't respond to them at night so they give up trying? Yes. Do I believe you will destroy any trust your baby has in you? No. 

Obviously I believe that CIO has negative effects, otherwise I would have done it by now. But what I believe even more about CIO is that sometimes, for the sanity of the parent, it is necessary. And that even if there are negative effects to CIO, a parent is not going to ruin their child forever because of it. Their baby will still thrive. Their baby will still know that they love him. Their baby will still trust them. Their baby will grow up and one day learn to cope with stress. I believe all this because, considering that the CIO method is said to have been around since the 1800s, I'm pretty sure that there are a fair amount of people in this world who had to CIO as a baby. And they likely turned out to be decent people. Yes, we have a lot of screwed up people in this world, but I don't think we can trace society's problems back to CIO. And given how my parents raised me and what I know to be true of their level of tolerance for children's shenanigans and the fact that they were just teenagers when they had me, I would bet my paycheck that at some point in time I was left to CIO as well. And I think I turned out mostly good.

But the people in the CIO camp are just as bad. They believe that if you don't sleep train your baby, that your baby will never learn to soothe itself. Your baby will be too dependent on you, even as they grow older. You will never have your life back. You can kiss your sex life goodbye. You're doing a disservice to your baby because babies grow and develop while they sleep.

Do I believe any of that? No. I believe everyone eventually learns how to fall asleep. I know my baby is thriving and developing- I can tell because he's getting bigger and hitting his milestones, so obviously he's getting the sleep he needs. I will have my life back one day, and besides- I chose this life and I don't get to turn off my parenting switch at night. My baby is already gaining independence- I see it every day as he spends time playing by himself, and at nap time when I can put him down before he's completely asleep and he falls asleep on his own.

Anyway, I can go over my reasons for choosing not to sleep train at this point in another post. 

The real reason I'm writing this post is because I'm just so sick of the attitude of some of the people who are on either side of the fence.

Often there is a bit of hostility or defensiveness with parents who have chosen to let their child CIO. I get it, they're tired of defending their choice just like I'm tired of defending mine. They say things sarcastically like "I'm the mean mom who lets their baby cry" or "I can tell I'm harming my baby because she wakes up happy", and on and on. And then always the, "But I get to sleep 12 hours every night" said in the 'so I don't give a fuck' tone. It feels so high and mighty, as if they have unlocked all the secrets to a blissful parent-baby relationship, and that we mere mortals who choose a different way should be looked down upon with pity.

But the other side is just as bad. I've heard countless times from people who choose not to sleep train that they know they sound judgmental when talking to other moms. 

Why though? Why do we have to judge each other for this at all? It's a parenting choice, and we all have the right to make our own parenting choices. 

Sitting up with your sleepless baby, rocking, walking, nursing for hours is hard. It's hard when you're exhausted, which is all the time because you don't get enough sleep. But guess what?

Sleep training and hearing your baby CIO is also hard! I don't know from experience, but I've heard from those who have done it that it was one of the hardest things they ever had to do. And I believe it, because that is also one of the reasons why I haven't done it. 

They are both hard. They both have their disadvantages. They both have their advantages. Neither way is going to ruin your child or make your child into the best, most well-adjusted child that ever was. 

So that's it, my long rant. What bugs me most about the CIO v.s. no CIO debate isn't that I think one is right and other is wrong. What bugs me is that it puts a wall between us parents, especially us mothers. There is no right or wrong, unless of course you're shoving your baby in a drawer at night as per the above illustration.

What we need is support for each other, regardless of our decisions. We might have strong feelings about ways to raise our children, but (barring any physical, mental or emotional abuse) it's never our place to impose those feelings on others and judge others' choices. That's why we have our own children- so we can raise them any damn way we want. 

And really, what does it matter? If we don't screw them up this way, surely we will find other ways in their lifetimes to scar them forever. 

(Just a disclaimer- when I talk about CIO, I'm not talking about simply letting your baby cry for extended periods of time without checking in or making sure basic needs are met. There are many sleep training methods that use various degrees of letting your baby cry, in a structured way, with parents present to make sure all needs are met first and to continually reassure the baby during the process. I will blatantly say that to leave your baby to cry with no plan, structure or periods of checking-in to make sure everything is okay is just plain cruelty.)